Balance... I still haven't figured that one out? Marriage, kids, house, laundry,work? I always go to bed at night thinking "oh i need to do this more" or " I need to be better at this". The pressures that we put on ourselves to be "perfect" really are stressful. I obviously know there is no perfect but for some reason I expect a lot. Even though Im with my kiddos A LOT!! I always feel like Im not there enough I mean how is that possible? I work such minimal hours so Im actually with them 95 percent of the time but I still feel like I dont do enough, I get mommy guilt. When were home I decide to tackle random projects like the other day I was cleaning my closet, filing, getting rid of and just organizing. P would come in and tell me what a mess I was making haha! Ryder was watching a movie and I was obsessively sorting and cleaning. All the while I thought I should be doing something fun with them, I should be playing with them, they're bored etc etc. It never ends! I always try to do playdates, swim, other random activities to keep them having fun and they do have fun its just me, I always worry Im not doing enough. My kids are happy, they know they are sooo loved by many, so I know all of this is me. Maybe I'll just chalk up the way I feel to hormones haha! Does anyone else have mommy guilt even when you know you shouldnt? Another hard one to balance is marriage especially with the little ones. I have always said that the hubs and I were going to have date nights atleast every other weekend, ya right! Those fell to the way side years ago I wish they didnt but they have. Its so hard with little ones sometimes getting a sitter is more work than its worth and it shouldnt be because a solid mommy and daddy means solid kiddos. We usually just laugh at the idea we enjoy being with our babies but its important to make time for us too! Another tricky thing to balance. With or without our weekly dates I still love that man more than anything! Another thing to add to my list for the 2000th time... date night ha! I hope one day it all clicks but for now I will just enjoy this life cuz gosh dangit its a great one!!!
Okay so that was a major rant but I have been thinking about this for awhile. I seriously need to simmer down now ha!
oh girl i'm soooooooo there with you on ALL of this. no kidding!! it's a never-ending battle. wish i could give you advice but i truly don't have any since this is all a constant struggle of mine. so... if you get some great advice please pass it my way. i will tell you that you can see how much your husband and kids love you just by looking at them. so that obviously means you're doing something right.
ReplyDeletePS- random, yet fun, bumping into you guys at serrano's on thurs. we oughtta actually plan to meet for dinner sometime. it'd probably be good for all of us. ;)
hang in there girlie!